You’re not just a fighter, but a tantric Buddhist master as well - isn't that just about sex?

In the West the majority of people associate the word tantric with prolonged sex sessions and the likes of Sting.

Or strange documentaries, like one a student of mine showed me on a shit-eating “German Sadhu” who had quite obviously lost his mind, probably from travelling in India combined with prolonged drug abuse.

The point is that the whole purpose of tantric practice is to understand emptiness, not endless orgasms that deplete rather than enhance your strength.

Normally when you have sex, the man orgasms in a couple of seconds or minutes - he cannot wait to shoot his load. Then you feel knackered and, as the scientists say your brain shrinks, which explains why there are so many idiots wandering around. So don’t feel too envious of your mate with the sexy girlfriend and his shrunken brain - feel blessed that yours is a minger!

A proper tantric master uses his internal fire to burn the semen into chi, and when the chi is moving around the internal organs and the chakras, you get the feeling of a permanent orgasm for a couple of hours. The girl also needs to be high level, not some slapper picked up from the local pub after too much alcohol and a kebab. This is something shit-eating Germans will never understand. I hope Sting can get his head round this - and we’re not talking about his purple one!

In the West all you hear about is the Kama Sutra but in China we have the Virgin Sutra which was written after the Yellow Emperor became weak from having sex with 1000’s of concubines. Miss Virgin taught him the art of using sex to cure illnesses and to retain your strength. In the future I will do a full translation of the Virgin Sutra to explain how to use sex to enhance your mental and physical well-being.

As the old Chinese proverb goes:
“ If you want to live a long life get an ugly wife.”